Lindsey at Suburban Turmoil recently requested doctor horror stories from her readers. Part of my story made it into her blog (but not the actual newspaper story).
A new friend (in! real! life!) – and I’m not naming names, but let’s just imagine that her name rhymes with Globbin – was telling me this terrible story about a guy she works with who just found out he’s dying. There were signs that he was sick, but doctors didn’t catch it. I pointed her to the Suburban Turmoil post, and she asked about my story.
(And then she implied that I may have made it all up, but let’s just leave her alone. Hee. :) Globbin has not yet learned that I am not one of those people who makes things up for attention. Because I don’t enjoy attention. Even though I guess I’m narcissistic enough to have a blog. ANYWAY.)
I’ve written about it before, but I’m not sure I’ve ever given as much detail as I did in my email to Lindsey. (It happened six years ago, but I’ve only recently been able to talk about it without tearing up.) Below is the beginning of my email to her. (It’s kind of a long story, so I’m going to break it up into pieces, a la the Mimi series to make you cry and then go hug your children.)
Oh, I so have one for you.
May 14, 2003.
[Editor’s note: Attentive readers will remember this as the day after Archer would be born six years later.]
I woke up and just did not feel well. It hurt to lie down. It hurt to breathe. It wasn’t excruciating, but I could tell something was just NOT RIGHT. I looked online but couldn’t find anything that made sense with my symptoms. My husband asked if I thought we should go to the emergency room. At first, I said no. I kept thinking I’d just miraculously start to feel better.
But I didn’t, and I could tell I was quickly feeling worse. By the time we got to the emergency room, I was feeling BAD. Something was really wrong. But, of course, this is the emergency room, and I didn’t come in an ambulance. “Abdominal pain” is not something the ER doctors jump to treat.
The guy who came in with the broken arm after me was called back before me (Doctor Fail #1).
The waiting area started to go dark. I managed to say something to my husband before I fainted or had a seizure.
[Editor’s note: Doctors said I probably fainted, but Brad thought it was a seizure because, apparently, my eyes were open the whole time, and my tongue was twitching in my open mouth… Either way, neither of these things had ever happened to me before then.]
I woke up vomiting and being rushed back to the treatment area on a stretcher.
How do you like THAT use of dramatic suspense?
(Spoiler: I lived.)
{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }
not sure you should really continue developing this friendship with that doubter, Globbin (aka the non-believer). seriously though….major doctor-fail! love your writing, by the way….ESPECIALLY your use of dramatic suspense!
Oh, the suspense IS killing me. Wait, let me guess…her name is HobNobbin’?
Actually, I’d like to weigh in here. So, we were in the waiting room when you started flipping out (in my mind SEIZING). I didn’t want to leave you, but I needed to get to the triage desk. So, I start pretty much screaming with a rather beautiful crescendo effect (help, Help, HELP!). There are bunch of weirdies sitting all about us also waiting or hanging out waiting to meet hot singles or whatever in the ERWR…ignoring me. I realize they probably think I’m the weirdie here, but after apparent-eternity someone looks up, sees you, and says,
“Oh! I’ll stay here with her while you go find a nurse!”
“What’s that you say? Nay. I’ll stay. You go find aid.”
Ok, so I didn’t really have the forethought to speak in rhyme, but I DID think – “What? That seems like an inappropriate allocation of roles.” – and SAID sternly – “No! YOU go get help, and I’LL stay with my wife!”
Anyway, at this point there is enough hubbub to slowly start the wheels of competence a-turnin’, and the nurses make their way over, you are lifted onto a bed, and wheeled through those doors where the real stuff happens. You sit up and vomit…
TALK ABOUT CLIFFHANGERS!
Teaser!